Work wasn't too annoying. I was actually pretty close to caught up and was clearing some things off my desk that I had been putting off. And then I got an email from Matt. It was some very frustrating news. The day pretty much went down hill from there. I was in a bad mood and crabby. I got home from work and Margie was still sleeping so I had some time to chat with Lily. I asked her if she gave a little boy in her Kid's Day Out a picture she had made for him and she told me she did. And that he threw it out and didn't say thank you. And that he said he didn't need it. She said she thought he didn't understand it was a special card. And my mama heart broke into a million pieces and I had to try very hard not to break into tears. Luckily she doesn't seem too bothered by it.
I was dragging and in much need of a cup of coffee.
The afternoon continued with both kids being irritable, which was further complicated by the fact that I was so irritable. Lily didn't want to eat her dinner. Out of nowhere she decided she doesn't like salmon anymore. It used to be her absolute favorite meal. I told her she needed to eat a certain amount in order to have dessert. She wouldn't eat it. She was throwing a fit and it was close to bed time. I sent her upstairs to put on her pjs and she threw a bigger fit. I was not in the mood to deal with her so I decided it was time for bed. I took her upstairs to help her with her pjs and she stood in the doorway, slinging daggers to my heart by asking, through her tears, "mommy why do you hate me?" {for the records, I love this child with every fiber of my being, and I know she knows that...she also already has a keen sense of what to say to inflict maximum guilt}. While I sat there, trying to figure out what happened to my flip-flop-in-January day, I realized we both needed hugs. I coaxed her over to me and scooped her up in my lap. And hugged her. A big hug. And she relaxed and hugged back, and peace was restored. We put jammies on and I put her in bed with two books. I went and got Margie, got her all jammied up, and we sat and read a book. It was wonderful and I felt redeemed as a mama.
Of course, after stories were over Margie decided she wasn't gonna go to sleep so I had to rock her and snuggle her longer than usual, which was exactly what my soul needed. Lily is drifting off to sleep next to me and all is right with the world once again.
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