Resolutions

Do you make resolutions for the new year? I kinda do, and they kinda last maybe a week. I have very, very poor follow through. I have lots of craft supplies for hobbies I am obsessed with...for a little bit. I work out hard core...for three days. I eat a healthy diet...until I get hungry or my sweet tooth gains control. I save money...until I want something. Do you see where this is going? This year, I am not so much making resolutions as making goals. Resolutions, in my mind, just seem destined for failure. I am kind of an all or nothing gal, so when I have a misstep with my resolution, I just chuck the whole idea. Also, though January 1 comes at the same time each year, I seem to be caught with lots of junk food in the house. Or I'm too tired to work out. Or, or, or...lots of excuses.

Some of my goals for 2012:
1) I want to be a "yes" mom as much as possible. I hate that because of my own selfishness, laziness, and agenda, I tell Lily no when she wants to do a craft, or play hide and seek, or help me with chores. I want to say yes to her more often (within reason...cookies for breakfast...no, not on a daily basis!)
2) I need to stop taking out my bad mood on my husband. He is my partner, my best friend. If I am crabby, I should look to him for support, not b*tch at him (there is no better word for what I do, sorry!)as though it is his fault. Taking out my crabbiness at him doesn't solve anything and doesn't make me feel better.
3) I want to eat real. I want to lose weight, but I am not going all fat free, low fat, etc. I want to cut out sugar and processed foods and not worry about eating a little butter.
4) I want to work out a little most days. So what if it is just some push ups and crunches in the living room? Anything is better than nothing and Lily and I had a good time doing "exercises" the other day. I need to get it out of my head that I need to do a video or go to the gym or whatever. Whatever I do at home is a step in the right direction.
5) I want to save up money. I need to make sure I am not buying things on impulse.
6) Better around the home! I need to get on a better cleaning schedule. I need to make sure I make a menu plan. Cooking at home will go a long way to a couple of my goals. And I love to cook. And I get huge satisfaction out of making a meal for my family, even if Chickie isn't always interested in what I make.
7) I just want to relax and be more chill.

What about you? Any goals for the New Year?

And oh yeah, I am not necessarily waiting until January 1 to start these changes. I figure might as well ease myself in...

One of Those Days

I am hoping a nice cup of tea corrects my mood today. Today, well today is one of those days. I am tired. My head hurts. My nose is stuffy. I don't feel like wiping bums or changing diapers. I don't feel like fixing lunch. Why oh why won't the baby nap? She usually sleeps all day. Why is today the one day in the history of ever that the pre-schooler doesn't want to watch cartoons? All I want to do is lay on the couch and take a nap. Is that so much to ask? Sometimes, as a mom, it is.

Today I am throwing myself a pity party. The thing about pity parties is that they can get out of control and turn into real ragers pretty fast. They can turn into the type of parties that, if they were actual parties, the neighbors would call the cops. It started with a little stress. When I stress, I eat. I eat cookies. Like a whole bag. And then I feel like a pig (which, kinda I am - it is pigly behavior!) I think how I wish I was still pregnant. But only for one very vain reason. I liked my appearance when I was pregnant. My hair was awesome. My skin was the clearest and brightest it has ever been. My clothes were comfortable and fit appropriately. I was expected that I would have a large tummy. And full panel maternity pants give that big ol' belly a nice smooth appearance. Sure, I was as big as a house, but that was a given. I was growing a life. Now, well now I am just flabby and mushy and ick! My skin is broken out and I have begun the lovely postpartum shedding.

There are so many things I want to get done today. I want to clean the house and put away the laundry. I want to finish a project with Lily. I would like to start wrapping gifts for under the tree. I want to look forward to making dinner tonight instead of dreading the task. Today, however, I am choosing to give myself grace. I am accepting that I have a two month old baby, that I am fighting a little cold, that I am sleep deprived. I am accepting that pigging out on cookies won't make my clothes fit better, but beating myself up about it won't help either. Today I am going to sip my tea and try to take a nap before we have to rush off to ballet. I am going to remember tomorrow is another day and that it is okay to push off today's chores every once in a while. I am going to remind myself that everyone has, from time to time, one of those days.

A Good Old Fashioned Lily Update

I haven't done a Lily update in a while. Okay, I haven't done much of any updating. Time to rectify that. Lily is awesome. She is in preschool four days a week and loves it! Everyday she asks if it is a school day when she wakes up. We had her first school conference at the end of October and her teachers had nothing but good things to say about her. She is the youngest in her class - they decided to put her in the older 3s younger 4s class instead of the three year old class - and she holds her own. She comes home with tons of projects and the best part of my day with her is the huge smile on her face and her yelling "Mommy mommy mommy!" when I pick her up after school. Don't get me wrong, she jumps out of the car without hardly looking back at drop off, but her reaction at pick up lets me know my little girl is still happy to see me despite her independent attitude. She knows all her letters, both upper and lower case. The other day Matt was wearing a shirt that said Polygamy Porter (that he got a million years ago at a Blues and Brews Fest in Salt Lake City!) and Lily asked what it said. He told her it said porter. She said what is that word, pointing to polygamy. Matt told her it said porter also. She said no it doesn't it has some different letters. And last night at dinner she told us the salt was sea salt (which it was). We asked her how she knew, and she said it said so on the bottle. She never ceases to amaze me! She is also starting to write her name. For the longest time she had no interest in writing at all, but I am happy she is starting to show some!
She is doing ballet, which she has been doing since summer. She really loves to dance and sing. She is constantly running around the house, dancing and making up songs. She always asks if I like her songs when she is done, and just to be sure I am paying attention, she asks which part I liked best.
Even though she runs around and is super loud at home, she is a bit reserved and can be quiet in a group of kids until she feels comfortable. It is always amazing to me to see her sitting quietly, playing by herself at playdates. She warms up, but she can start out shy.
Lily dresses herself every morning, which is awesome. I let her wear whatever she wants as long as it is weather appropriate. She is really good about making sure she has long sleeves, pants, socks, and clean undies. She usually picks out one of her summer dresses to put on top. Almost nothing matches except the two socks. I think it is fantanstic! I love her sense of style. In fact, this morning she told me she doesn't like matching, as she walked out of her room in blue animal print pants and a Halloween dress. With pink socks.
My chickie and I really seem to have hit our stride lately. I am really enjoying her and feel like she is listening and behaving better. It is the little things, like her letting me do her hair without complaint as well as the bigger things, like staying with me when we are out. She is still a little firecracker though! She says the funniest things and keeps me laughing constantly. Lily is such an awesome big sister. She is so loving towards Margie and lately she keeps telling me the best day of her life is when Margie "got borned." She says she will never stop loving Margie and she hopes they are sisters forever. Seriously, I don't know where she gets this. Her heart is just that big!
Lily has a busy winter coming up with ballet, soccer and swimming. And preschool four days a week. We will be busy, but hopefully we survive. We have been doing a lot of projects lately. Lily loves projects and asks to do one every day. Her attention span is a lot longer than it used to be, so I no longer mind doing projects as much. I used to get frustrated with how quickly she would be done with a project.
I can't believe my first baby is such a kid now. She is so independent in so many areas. I am so glad she can go potty on her own and dress herself and get her milk or juice out of the fridge, but sometimes I look at her and have to really squint to see the baby she was, and it makes me a little sad. She is growing up so darn fast!


Gorgeous picture taken by my friend Kelly


She loves to play soccer


Making bird feeders on Thanksgiving at Grandma Chris's


Lily's sense of style


Making cookies with Grandma Mari




With Daddy at Holiday Magic at the Brookfield Zoo


I love that she actually smiles for pictures now!

Margie is 2 Months Old!!

Margie is two months old! Time has really flown by. We had her two month check up today. Stats as follows:
Weight: 13 pounds, 90th percentile
Height: 22 3/4 inches, 75th percentile
Head: 15 1/2, 70th percentile

Size wise she is just a wee bit smaller than Lily was at the same age. Like 3 ounces and half an inch smaller. Head wise she is actually half a centimeter, or whatever unit they use, bigger than Lily which blows my mind because I always thought Lily had such a big head and don't think that about Margie. Margie wears 3 month or 3-6 month clothes and is in cloth diapers full time. She eats when she is hungry, which is every two to three hours during the day and she is up twice at night to eat. She is an awesome sleeper - I never knew it could be like this with a newborn (ahem, Lily!). Her most awake time is from about 6 pm until 11 pm, but sometimes she is a little crabby then. She is super strong and can hold her head up with no problems. She is even trying to roll, though I think we have some time. She is a little sad today because she got three shots :(. I actually got a little teary as she was getting poked.

I was afraid having a baby in October would mean we were destined to be cooped up until spring, but Mother Nature has been kind to us with mild temperatures (though I think it is changing as we speak!) Margie has been to the zoo twice and regularly hangs out in the Moby while I take Lily out to run around and kick the soccer ball around.


Lily is an awesome big sister and just loves Margie to death. She is a great helper and I am so relieved with how well she adjusted. If she ever shows any signs of jealousy, her discontent is directed at me, not the baby. Lily loves to help pick out Margie's diaper and likes to help me with her laundry by stacking up the clean wipes. Any time Margie cries, she tells me she thinks her baby needs some milk. She will run and get a paci or burp cloth when I ask and patiently waits if she needs something while I am nursing. I so hope my two girls will be the best of friends when they are older, like I am with my sisters. I know Lily is anxious for Margie to be able to play with her, and Margie is already starting to stare at Lily with fascination. It melts my heart! Where ever Margie is, Lily isn't far.


I just love my two girls so much! Margie is such a perfect addition to our family!